Successful Relationships Advise
When you think of the word
successful relationships
, what image comes to mind? Also by who’s definition, and by what criteria are successful relationships and
good relationships
measured? How does your successful relationship measure up and more importantly how do you get your relationship back on track with your spouse, your family, or extended family?
First
about me
. I am not a marriage counselor a licensed therapist, a match maker or a doctor. However I have been married to the same lovely woman I first fell in love with over 24 years ago in 1985 and am still crazy about her to this day.
So I think I do have have some real life practical experience to draw upon-in speaking frankly to youabout the subject matter of successful relationships and what is required on your part Tips for Successful Relationships Buliding....
Rule Number# 1: Where is God in your Relationship?
If you think you're going to receive a Sermon on the Mount dissertation on the importance of including the God of the entire universe in your relationship building-don't worry..my site is not about that.
However drawing from my own personal Christian background and my own personal relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ Himself, I make no excuses and offer no apologies if my faith offends you or someone else.
My philosophy is this, as tough as it is just surviving in this game called life it is difficult enough on good days at times, and I praise God that I have my faith in the Lord to draw upon every day (especially in times of need).
Don’t worry I am not trying to convert you into becoming a Christian-that’s the Lord’s doing-not mine. I’m just trying to make you understand that the Power of Prayer is HUGE and having faith in a personal Savior that you can talk to any hour of the day is very encouraging for yourself personally and for your spiritual maturity and personal growth.
I firmly believe that most everyone on this planet including yourself believes in something and believe especially in matters of relationships that this should be first on your to do list in calling upon the name of the Lord for help and guidance with all suspects of your relationship. There’s an old adage The family that Prays Together-Stays Together Think, pause and reflect upon those words and allow God to minister to your successful relationship needs.
Rule # 2: Put your successful relationship needs above your own personal needs
As human beings, everyone of us has his/her own agenda, it’s part of the human condition called sin that everyone of us were born into. We all want when we want it at everyone else’s’ expense which is just not right.
I know what I’m talking about here as I was in this same category earlier in my marriage--always putting my personal needs and wants above my wife’s. I almost lost my wife in divorce due to my very selfish nature.
Am I perfect-no I am not-and last time I checked-no-one else is as well.
But this is something I have to work at daily and you will need to do so as well if you want a meaningful and successful relationship that is God centered.
Rule #3: Honesty really is the Best Policy...
I know you’ve heard this saying before but this is so true not only in life itself but in your relationships. Do you think an employer would keep you on the pay roll knowing you are purposely cooking the accounting books?! Why do you think your spouse should keep you around and think any differently if you continue to spend behind his/her back? …
Or...
If you’re doing other wrongful, hurtful, unethical or immoral acts? Your actions bear a consequence and affect not only yourself but others as well including your spouse, parents, or your entire family. Maybe your situation is such that you need professional
counseling
and therapy. This is fine providing you, your spouse and family are in agreement. The important part is you recognize the warning signs and are thinking enough of your relationship to make it a happy relationship and hopefully a loving relationship as well.
Rule# 4: Learn to Forgive and to Ask for
Forgiveness
Do you realize the hardest two words to say are ? It is far much easier to harbor anger and the resentment and bitterness than to be contrite and show a true remorseful attitude and spirit towards your spouse or family. I realize for many that you me be at such a point in your life that you feel that you can’t be forgiven or that you are unable to genuinely forgive others-Why is this so?
We all make mistakes-none of us are perfect, and unresolved feelings of bitterness, anger and resentment will continue to grow like a cancer-eventually choking off the remaining life of your once successful relationship. Life is far too short. The grave yards are full of could of, should of, would of….
people who only wish that they had a second chance. You do, don’t let the sun set tonight before making amends in healing your broken relationship-whether it is with your parents, your neighbor down the street, your spouse or your kids. I’ve been there.
14 years ago my mother died in Saudi Arabia where she worked since 1981 I believe. Some years before that we had a falling out, and I refused to forgive her for things that were done earlier as a child due to my parents
divorce
.
Fast forward…...
In December of 1993 my mother visited us one last time which we didn’t realize would be the last time, my brothers and I would ever see her alive again. At my loving wife’s urging..I asked my mother's forgiveness and vs. versa. We shed tears as we were both looking forwards to a renewed mother-son relationship.
I was really looking forwards to seeing her during her next scheduled visit which was to be in October 1994.
My mother died October 16, 1994 of a massive heart attack. She never got to see her son finish grad school, or many of the other things my wife, and my brothers and I had planned with her.
But you know what? I have the peace knowing that I forgave her and she did the same for me Christmas of 1993.
Life is too short….and once your loved ones are buried –it’s too late..…All relationships are worth it-even yours....
Remember: ”The only Unfulfilled Goals in Your Life are the Ones you Never Attempt”
personal goal setting

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